


“If our loves insanity, why are you my clarity?” -( Reunion Fic Lit post Prince Lestat)

by Violet_Amber_Vamps1



Category: Vampire Chronicles - Anne Rice
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-07-12
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:13:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25222939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Violet_Amber_Vamps1/pseuds/Violet_Amber_Vamps1
Summary: What happened after their first hunt together after decades apart?Cue flashbacks from Daniels dreams (Nightmares) to Qotd era and the catalyst of what drove them apart in the Night Island years after everyone else had left post Akasha crisis. Hint of Daniels fragile mental state. Flash forward to Armand in present day Trinity Gate  in Chapter 2 with a well meaning Marius trying to aid the two of them but confusing a reunion.
Relationships: Armand/Daniel Molloy
Comments: 1
Kudos: 3





	“If our loves insanity, why are you my clarity?” -( Reunion Fic Lit post Prince Lestat)

**Author's Note:**

> This is set after their hunt, given just one line in the last chapter of Prince Lestat, but which got my OTP shippy heart fluttering with the possibilities. I've been sitting on this for years in my notebook adding to it now and again but never fully typing it up til now. It had two parts so far. But will end up being two whole chapters eventually.
> 
> Chapter one: Daniels Pov first person  
> Chapter two: Armands pov. Marius is a back ground character between the two offering advice.

Daniel-

I never quite got used to awaking alone, as night fell and the death sleep released it’s hold usually my mind played tricks - I could still smell the woody fabric softener the Egyptian cotton sheets were laundered in on the Night Island. Breathing in the sweeter scent of his maker. Before I could reach out to stroke auburn curls, reality struck and with a pang I realised not only was Miami no longer my home. But it’d been far too long since Armand had warmed my bed.

Tonight a bittersweet pang would be welcome to the awful and frantic pounding of this strong immortal heart, as I fought awake from a recently recurring nightmare. Blood sweat clung to naturally bed head mane. Knowing from many occasions previous ash blonde would almost be tinted pink by it. As when mortal dreams weren't clearly recalled every time. In this case with each replay it became more vivid. It began sweetly with intimate blood play, resulting in 'that' argument faithfully recalled in crystal clarity with a gut wrenching twist ending. Madness was clawing it's hold even then, confusion gaps in time happening with worrying frequency. As day dreams invaded reallife. So far I'd masked it well from my lover or so I'd hoped. Hunting separately from my love the first betrayal. In hindsight this translated as distance without meaning to this fulfilling Armands prophecy of inevitable estrangement between maker and fledgling. Their intimacy hadn't suffered, more naivety on his part. It became well orchestrated not wishing to reveal this 'condition' through blood kisses. Dealing with this set back, whatever it was alone his sacrafice - as breaking his vow had been Armands. Unable to face heaping more hurt on the beautiful five hundreds year old. He'd only blame himself. I couldn't face adding to the centuries of self recrimination, regret, guilt or pain, he strove above all to balance the scales of these former woes in those warm brown orbs. Fights escalated all the same. After the latest truce they'd made love with fevered intensity as always. Worshipping every inch of his makers glowy alabaster flesh, soft, supple silk over iron strength. Making the most of heightened vampirirc senses. Each having a decade to learn the tune of the others body. Strum maximum pleasure. The mechanics I'm not going to go into, let's just say we're at the second act - a similar dance with the same moves another story - R rated sexy fun with a vampire this is not. Still a searing dance of give and take. Every bite and caress building to their climax. Alot of scope of pleasure to play with, blood sharing the one time their mental barriers could be breached. In sharing at the same time that is, I was artful in concealing fears at these moments. Not allowing simultaneous biting and limiting how much blood Armands took till the end of their tryst. 

I'd pushed the elder back into their fluffy quilt. Somehow they'd ended up at the opposite end of their king sized bed, a tussle of wills and coupling bodies. I was the victor at this stage of their sensual battle. One hand cradling the others head, reddish curls stroking digits in all their untamed glory, almost with a life of their own - wrapping this way and that about them. I always preferred it long. My other hand snaking beneath the smaller immortal, stroking down his spine, glassy nails. Thumbs pausing to touch dimples on either side, then trailing with just enough pressure to make his beloved gasp, arching his back. Hand stopping to cup his partners furthest buttock. The elder gazing up at me with heavy lust lifted eyes. My front pushed as far as I could against Armands. Pelvises grinding. Leaning down to meet rosy full lips, as they trembled to press into his own. Breathing "I love you", as they met, ghosting down to his favoured spot on that graceful neckline. Fangs breaking the skin. "Only yours" was your whispered reply as the swoon took him, gripping me closer inturn shuddering his surrender against his fledglings body. Bliss...Better than any liquor in the rich intoxicating life blood of his maker. Thoughts curled around eachother, like a physical embrace. "Yes...Only yours too...Never forget! No matter what happens," Lulled by his paramour powerful heart. His favourite music. So closely wedded together they seemed to answer eachother, beat to beat. A perfect intimacy - "Nearly perfect..." Armands voice like a velvet caress added echoing in his ears. Felt the smile that accompanied the words. A feather light kiss on his neck as Armand gently slid fangs completing the circle. It felt so right, truly this was bliss, to feel his makers mind and soul open to him, and him alone. After five hundred years of seeking he trusted someone enough, wanted to trust in their bond completely enough to show a portion of all he was for better or worse. I fought through the initial rush of the exchange. Gaining self possession to place a barrier hastily in place within his psyche. Not enough to bar someone as psychically gifted as Armand if pushed but more than adequate of an evasion for the elder to notice. Felt the tentative touch of inquiry against this shield. "No...." Panic bubbled that all my months of planning were for nought. "No," Repeated more firmly seemingly in my mind alone, though outloud too as I abruptly physically broke contact. Ripping of fangs out in the process, tearing Armands skin accidentally. 

Still held in a strong hold by Armand, whom I knew out classed me, but disliked showing such crude power plays in their relationship. For all his famed temper, control and flaws striking out with full force, using this superior strength to his advantage wasn't his way. Preferring pulling verbal barbs to punches until Daniel upped the stakes. All that coiled strength on show in this moment. Controlling me just long enough to remove his fangs from my neck delicately. Smoothing droplets of blood. Releasing me arms loosely laying on the quilt. "I'm yours that much is true..." Staring straight into my amethyst eyes. "But your not truly mine now after all my love, are you," Tone matter of fact weary and jaded to the core beneath it all. The reddening eyes and first drop of blood tears the only indication to a casual observer of the true distress. Letting them freely roll down those perfect cheeks. 

My heart was racing for very different reasons to moments before, took in the plateau before me, easing one arm from its resting place to prop myself up. One armed above his maker. No tear ragged marks on that lovely neck. But I knew stroking a finger across the smear. Eyes keeping contact. Tears coursing down a face the word 'beautiful' didn't give adequate justice to. Other hand reluctantly de-entangled from auburn tendrils, cupping said ethereal face, thumb stroking away tears. Kissing away one that balanced on the cupids bow above Armands full top lip. 

"Do you prefer tasting me like this...Heartbreak to shared bliss?!" Voice wavering, partway through choking on emotion. "Why the fear? That barrier. Tell me whats wrong." He pleaded. I backed up, if he touched me now it was all over. "I'm sorry", was all I could think to say leaving our - For everything, for not being a good enough fledgling, let alone companion to you for eternity, for despite my best efforts hurting your soul and adding to your scarred heart. My jobs to kiss the cracks, salve those wounds not cut into them anew!...- "Ofcourse not. Tears of joy are all I can stand times running down your face... I hate this, always hate to hurt you. Pushing you away here." Pulling back and tapping my head, just above the temples, to sit on my legs. "I can't...But you have to trust me. I'm doing this because I love you." Watching as Armand sat upright hugging his legs to himself, head resting on top of his knees. Hair falling around him like a shield. "Love is sharing. You once told me. I've given you all of me. Together in Hell after all...But it's been Heaven, tangible for the first time since I was mortal. Here with you....Damn you, Daniel! For showing me paradise on earth and then taking it away from me one piece of intimacy at a time these last six months."

"Six months....What do you mean?" I could hear fear in my own question. "I know I've not hunted with you recently, been away of and on. But I've not been distant for that long...Same old dance," I snapped bitterly, certainty flailing. My defence never failing to rise at inappropriate moments. There was more than one stubborn arse in this relationship.

"Trust you," Eyes glittering beneath your curtain of hair. "I've let absences slide, not wanting to curtail your freedom, exploration on your so new to the blood..." Moistening of lips, a reflex usually in times of stress. Very human. "The last person that promised me eternity cast me aside for five hundred years, Daniel. Trust is a give and take affair. I have reasons to fear betrayal. You more than anyone knows this! That's the tragedy." Sighing deflated. "Your leaving aren't you. I thought we'd beat fate. But the hate wins out," Looking up suddenly, dried blood veining your face in random patterns. Expression blank, prophetic even. Hated the iciness, remote way you sometimes shut down. Your own defences rising to the challenge, as if discussing a mundane topic, only eyes giving away the weight behind this question. Wincing at the mention of Marius in all but name. "I can't erase what he did...What little I know from Lestats book," Never from your lips to my ears though, my love. I didn't add, hurt pride can take a back seat. "I'll leave word regularly. Send audio tapes explaining everything I promise." My logic and thought process flawed even if my heart was in the right place - in my defence it hadn't sounded so hollow at the time - Damned self reflection. "I don't hate you. We have the same soul. It was fate we met. I get frustrated, centuries of having no-one to rely on is a hard habit to break. Haven't I proven myself by now?...I always came back. For better or worse. Im here for the long haul!" Trying not to get angry, a familiar groove in a record playlist of accusation. So scored by repetition it would show daylight. We both had unsuitable copying mechanisms.

"Maybe I've been pushing. But you've let me. You always had a reason to come back before....I've barely drank from you in months." Pause and Lord save me you turned the full beam of your gaze straight on me before utterly the killer line. "Is there someone else?" Eyes breaking contact, staring fixedly at the crumpled quilt between them. Last question so plaintive it broke my heart, and nearly my resolve too. But I resented this lack of trust all the same. Hadn't fully realised the truth was in the blood, I'd damaged our bond by withholding this as much from Armand, as his fear of abandonment had. I took a breath. "Two reasons both involved you. I wanted the blood as much for me as 'you'. How else could I shelter you from yourself. This is a blip for us. I haven't changed my mind. How can you even ask!" My voice strained, trying not to shout. "Only ever in your orbit!" Slowly crawling back on hands and knees to you. "Noone like you..."

"If that's so trust in me, stay. What I'd I can't cope with you gone." Your voice small, liquid brown eyes watching my progress as I travelled towards him. Even when fighting tooth and claw enchanted by eachother.

"It works both ways....We all have our secrets. You're a survivor." Stopping in front of Armands huddled form.. "Emotional blackmail, nice." Those words cutting me deeper than I wanted to let on, struck a chord of fear.That by opening himself to love the elder had compromised his own shields. Tugging at my hair in frustration. "You managed five hundred years without me," He rebuked wetness on his face now, smell of his own blood. Armand watched these tracks snake down. 

"Surviving Daniel, yes." Tilting head in acqience. "Not living. I had nothing else to lose then. Heart a redundant organ. A furnace only - till you." Reaching out and wiped away one of my tears. Touching it to his lips gently. "Why would I regale you with tales of my first love, when I hoped you were my last." Scooting to the edge of the bed, leaning down to scoop his discarded robe by the side of the bed, putting it on wrapping the cord tight. Cutting off any glimpse of his body. Standing and moving onto the balcony. Crossing arms and gripping his side's fiercely.

"Our love is a battlefield..." I whispered studying the tense back, watching hands claw into flesh. Armand staring out into the night as if all the answers were there.

"I'll happily joust with you throughout eternity if the fight is true." Defeat in his tone. Still as a statue. I got up to, hugging him from behind, kissing his head, aware of more tears falling onto his arms. Tried in vain to prise his finger nails out of his own sides. Knew I'd evoked so much emotion he'd shut down. A mechanism he'd learned through horrors past. This had gotten worse since the coven had gathered. We'd made such progress. After the tearful reunion with Marius and they'd been in the same prolonged company, I'd noted a polite distance. Read the body language that exuded calm, ease translated it as the opposite. A decade of observation paying off. Showing all was not well at all. I was there to pick up the pieces - not judge in the interim. Hushed conversations, Marius literally flying off sometimes. I'd wipe away any tears he'd not even known had fallen. Usually startled he'd smile, kiss my hands, fingers, not sensing my presence until then. But charmed I was there all the same. 

Once he'd said. "The opposite of love isn't hate, but apathy." I'd taken him hunting pirates that night, just to let off steam.

He was up before me next day, I lagged behind him deathsleep wise by around thirty minutes on bad days he'd have vacated the bed by then. On good days still there. Today he was on his side watching me, memorizing I guess. Lump in my throat. I reached a hand out to cup his face. You closed your eyes, nuzzled into it, eyes closing as you inhaled. Next to you was a pouch, the amulet. "Take it with you, just incase, yes." Voice too calm. Still not opening your eyes.

"Okay." Shit it felt like a parting gift.

"I'll leave the answerphone on, have my mobile with me. As I mightnt linger here for long."

"Where would you be then?" I asked unsure now. You usually followed where I went. To not imagine you here unchanged was disconcerting.

"Does it matter. There's my office too. Maybe you'll have to find me this time around." Heavy sigh, you opened your eyes finally. "I can't wait for you here forever, beloved. I'd be a ghost haunting our home." 

The rest is a blur, really. Leaving felt like an outerbody experience. Wrong on many levels. Again in hindsight not the greatest testament to my then mental state.

Oh I almost forgot the nightmare twist ending. So in this nightmare. I went to the boat to leave, but left the pouch behind. Armand rushes out down the steps to the jetty. Holding the cloth aloft, except it's daylight and the amulet in it sets on fire, then so does Armand. Do you see the symbolism there. I don't appreciate it. Because it makes me scream everytime. 


End file.
